Would I still be drawing paintings if I could run 100 meters in less than 9.58 seconds; if I could lift 215 kg in the snatch and 270 kg in the clean and jerk; if I could do the high jump for 2.50 meters; if I had become a successful revolutionist; and if I had the skills of flying and diving 10.000 meters?
I don’t know the answers of these questions…
At a point where these questions remain unanswered, the painting stands as “what I do” in the balance sheet of what I can and cannot do in my life.
Would not I draw paintings if living was sufficient?
What does the sufficiency of that life outside mean?
Is this possible without being made up of a terrific selfishness, mind and spirit mediocrity, slyness and also stupidity?
The art is associated with the need of changing the world and it is certainly not a simple tool… It is not something that will substitute for the other instruments. Nevertheless, it has a score to settle with the feeling of failure!
Performing art is a state of “having an issue”. It is fading away/weakening, fades away/weakens as it moves away from the intrinsicness that the art requires and draws near to a social ritual.
When I insistently strive to answer the question of “why”, I realize that I am somewhat a captive of this “apparatus” called art in this knife-edge walk we call life.